Operations
Riot Provisions
How It Works
The Flavor Profile We start with a consultation to understand your goals—whether you’re training for a marathon, fueling a high-pressure work week, or just tired of takeout. We map out your likes, dislikes, and "never-evers."
The Sourcing Our chefs hit the markets to source the freshest seasonal produce and proteins. We prioritize local purveyors and high-quality ingredients because a riot is only as good as its foundation.
The Kitchen Takeover On your scheduled "Riot Day," we come to your home. We handle every aspect of the cooking process in your kitchen—no industrial "ghost kitchens" here. You’ll come home to a kitchen that smells incredible and a fridge fully stocked.
The Clean Sweep We leave your kitchen cleaner than we found it. No dishes, no scrap piles, no evidence we were there—except for the labels on your containers.
The Arsenal Audit
PHASE I: THE RECONNAISSANCE (THE RAID)
We begin with a cold-eye assessment of your current inventory. This is the "Search and Destroy" phase. We evaluate every item in your pantry, fridge, and freezer against three professional metrics: Purity, Potency, and Purpose.
The Purge: We identify and eliminate expired spices (which lose flavor after 6 months), oxidized oils, and filler ingredients packed with stabilizers and low-grade sugars.
The Equipment Debrief: We inspect your primary tools—knives, pans, and cutting boards. We identify what needs sharpening, what needs replacing, and what is simply taking up valuable "tactical real estate."
PHASE II: THE LOGISTICS (STRATEGIC RESTOCKING)
Once the "noise" is removed, we build the foundation. We don't shop at standard grocery aisles for the essentials; we source the building blocks that chefs use to create depth of flavor.
Fat & Acid: We restock your armory with high-smoke-point fats, finishing oils, and fermented vinegars that provide the "brightness" missing from home cooking.
The Spice Matrix: We replace dusty, pre-ground powders with whole seeds and high-potency blends, organized for high-frequency use.
The Umami Layer: We integrate professional "cheat codes"—miso, high-grade anchovies, dried fungi, and aged salts—that allow you to build restaurant-quality flavor in half the time.
PHASE III: THE DEPLOYMENT (KITCHEN ARCHITECTURE)
The final phase is the physical setup of your workspace. We organize your arsenal based on ergonomic flow:
The Hot Zone: Positioning your high-frequency tools and fats within arm's reach of the stove.
The Prep Station: Streamlining your cutting area for maximum efficiency and safety.
The Intel Handover: We provide you with a customized "Restock List" and a sourcing guide so you can maintain the integrity of your Arsenal long after we leave
Private Revolution
The Experience
The Intelligence Phase For groups of this size, we go deep. We don't just ask about allergies; we ask about your favorite travel memories, your go-to wine regions, and the specific atmosphere you want to evoke. We use this intel to build a one-of-a-kind menu that tells a story.
The Arrival & Transformation Our chef arrives with everything needed—from the high-end ingredients to specialized plating tools. We adapt to your space, whether it’s a minimalist condo kitchen or a sprawling estate. You set the playlist; we set the table.
The Choreography Service for 2–4 is intimate. Courses are paced perfectly to your conversation. We provide "table-side" finishes—perhaps a torch-fired herb bundle, a poured consommé, or a narrated explanation of a rare ingredient—adding a layer of theater to your evening.
Total Discretion We understand that for an intimate dinner, privacy is paramount. Our team is trained to be attentive but invisible, ensuring your space remains yours while the magic happens in the background
Dinner Party Takeover
What to Expect
We don't just cook; we curate an experience. From 6 to 12 guests, we handle the logistics so you can actually spend time with the people you invited.
Custom Rebellion: No "Set Menu A or B" here. We collaborate with you to design a multi-course menu that reflects your tastes—whether that’s refined molecular gastronomy or elevated, messy comfort food.
Complete Autonomy: We handle the grocery shopping, the prep, the service, and—most importantly—the cleanup. Your kitchen will look like we were never there.
Interactive Vibes: Our chefs are part of the party. Want to learn the secret to that sear? Ask away. Want us to fade into the background while you talk business? Consider us ghosts.
Pricing the Riot
At The Culinary Riot, we keep our service fees transparent so you know exactly what you’re paying for: Chef Nick’s expertise, time, and professional "chaos-free" execution.
Please Note: All rates listed below are for professional chef services only. The cost of food/ingredients is not included and will be billed separately based on your custom menu selections and market price.
Our Services
Arsenal Audit (Kitchen Consultation)
Rate: $50 Hourly
The mission: A tactical walkthrough of your kitchen. We’ll organize your tools, audit your pantry, and sharpen your home cooking strategy.
Private Revolution (Intimate Dining for 2–4)
Rate: $100 Per Person
The mission: An elevated, multi-course experience tailored for small groups. Perfect for date nights or high-end double dates.
Dinner Party Takeover (Event Dining for 6–12)
Rate: $150 Per Person
The mission: We take over your kitchen so you can actually enjoy your guests. A full-scale restaurant experience delivered to your dining room.
Riot Provisions (Meal Solutions)
Rate: Package Service Starting @ $250
The mission: Custom meal prep and pantry stocking designed for your lifestyle. Fees are associated per individual customer to ensure a personalized "Riot" in your fridge every week.
The Fine Print
Travel: Proudly serving a 75-mile radius from Waterloo, IL (Greater St. Louis Area).
Market Fluctuations: Prices are subject to change based on seasonal availability and market conditions.
Groceries: To ensure the highest quality, Chef Nick hand-picks your ingredients; these are billed as a separate reimbursement so you only pay for exactly what we cook.
The Riot Manifesto: Rules of the Kitchen
I. Respect the Ingredient, Not the Rulebook. Nature does the hard work; we just bring the heat. We source the best, then we stay out of the way—unless a little chaos makes it better.
II. Flavor is Non-Negotiable. If a dish doesn't make you pause your conversation after the first bite, it hasn't earned its place on the table. We don't do "subtle" if it means "boring."
III. No Stuffy Sh*t. White tablecloths don't make the food taste better. Great company and a chef who knows their craft do. We leave the pretension at the door; we keep the technique on the plate.
IV. Your Kitchen, Our Playground. We treat your home with the respect of a sanctuary but the energy of a professional line. We come in, we execute, and we leave it cleaner than we found it.
V. The Secret Ingredient is Always Acid. Salt brings the flavor, but acid brings the life. If a dish is "missing something," it’s usually a splash of vinegar, a squeeze of citrus, or a fermented kick.
VI. Prep Like a Surgeon, Cook Like a Rebel. The precision happens behind the scenes so the service can feel effortless. We measure to the gram so we can play with the fire.
VII. If It’s On the Plate, It’s There for a Reason. No "decorative" parsley. No useless garnishes. If you can’t eat it, or if it doesn't elevate the dish, it’s clutter.
VIII. We Cook with the Seasons, Not the Trends. If it’s not growing, it’s not glowing. We follow the soil, not the "likes."
IX. The Clean-Up is Part of the Craft. A true professional doesn't leave a mess for the host. The Riot ends when the counters shine and the dishwasher is humming.
X. Eat Bravely. We’re going to serve you things you’ve never tried, or prepared in ways you never imagined. Trust the process. Join the Riot.
Meet The Chef
The Lead Disruptor: Chef Nick
I didn't learn to cook to follow recipes; I learned to cook to break them. After 20 years in kitchens across the St. Louis landscape, I realized that the best food doesn't happen in a sterile restaurant—it happens in the home, where the atmosphere is electric and the rules don't apply.
My Philosophy: If it isn't bold, it isn't on the plate. I believe in sourcing ingredients with integrity and cooking them with intensity. The Culinary Riot is my way of bringing that "back-of-house" fire directly to your dining table.
The Origin: Started in St. Louis, MO perfected in the heat of 20 years of kitchens.
The Mission: To kill the boring dinner party.
The Style: High-end ingredients, low-ego service, explosive flavor.
Favorite Tool: My 30$ KAI Gyuto knife.